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USO Sending Paris Hilton Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson to Iraq

It definitely looks like it’s time for everyone to lighten up. Yesterday General Electric the parent company of NBC, fresh from their success with the Madonna concert at Wembley Stadium in London announced that it had instructed its news anchors to now refer to the conflict in Iraq as a “Civil War.” Today President Bush fired back that Iraq was not in a “Civil War.” A Civil War according to the dictionaries is defined as a struggle between various groups (or regions) of a country. If that’s the case then why wasn’t Iraq called a Civil War months ago? Are we all illiterate or just completely spun out and brainwashed?

President Bush is a stubborn Southern Man. Years ago Neil Young wrote a song about the American Civil War called “Southern Man”. Here are the lyrics: “Southern man better keep your head, Don't forget what your good book said, Southern change gonna come at last, Now your crosses are burning fast, Southern man, I saw cotton and I saw black, Tall White Mansions and little shacks. Southern man when will you pay them back? I heard screamin' and bullwhips cracking How long? How long? Southern man better keep your head, Don't forget what your good book said, Southern change gonna come at last, Now your crosses are burning fast. Southern man. Lily Belle your hair is golden brown, I've seen your black man comin' round, Swear by God I'm gonna cut him down! I heard screamin' and bullwhips cracking How long? How long?”

Now we are told that Iraq is having a Civil War. Isn’t that an oxymoron? The Americans and the Iraqis are certainly not acting in a civil fashion. People are definitely not engaged in a civil war when they routinely use power drills on their captives’ bodies prior to beheading them in snuff films shown on Al- Jazeera television. No wonder President Bush turned off the power in Bag Dad. Doesn’t he remind you of Prince Charles just waiting for the Queen to die? King charles will be a King who once stated that he wished to reincarnate as Camilla’s bicycle seat. No wonder England no longer has an Empire. At least New York has an Empire State building.

For the past 3 years President Bush has been pounded by journalists and voters alike because the journalists and voters claim that there was no connection between 9/11, Al Qaeda and Iraq, and the White House insists that there was in order to justify Iraq. Weren’t the Al Qaeda hijackers on 9/11 and the Iraqis all Muslim? President Bush said today that the sectarian violence rocking Iraq is not civil war but part of an Al Qaeda plot to use violence to goad Iraqi factions into repeatedly attacking each other. "No question it's tough, no question about it," Mr. Bush said at a news conference with Estonian President Toomas Hendrik Ilves. "There's a lot of sectarian violence taking place, fomented in my opinion because of the attacks by al Qaeda in Iraq causing people to seek reprisal.”

Hasn’t anyone told President Bush that Al Qaeda are Sunnis fighting the Shiites? Hasn’t anyone mentioned to President Bush that sectarian violence is the definition of Civil War? Maybe he thinks that Civil War is only when the North fights the South, or the Sunni East fights the Western Shiites and the Northern Kurds. In any event Estonian President Ilves pledged to send a troop to Iraq because just in case America wins he wants a share of the oil. Where is Estonia? Is it really even a country or just some fiction created by the White House to bolster their baloney about having a coalition of the willing? Very few people are still willing to listen to President Bush’s baloney any longer including his own American people. It turns out that the Dixie Chicks were right and the Americans were wrong three years ago to stop playing the Chicks’ music on the radio and for refusing to buy their albums. Why aren’t the American media screaming that it was President Bush who brought Al Qaeda into Iraq in the first place? They wouldn’t dare go near Iraq when President Hussein was living it up in his golden palaces with his golden showers.

In January 2004 CBS News became involved in their own civil war. They aired a story about President Bush’s National Guard service. It was decided that some of the facts were wrong and CBS News fired 4 of their staffers including 3 executives including senior vice president Betsy West, executive producer Josh Howard and senior broadcast producer Mary Murphy aka Eminem. At the time CBS Chairman Leslie Moonves issued this statement on behalf of CBS: “We deeply regret the disservice this flawed 60 Minutes Wednesday report did to the American public, which has a right to count on CBS News for fairness and accuracy.” CBS had reported that President Bush had failed to appear for a physical exam while in the National Guard. CBS News asked former Attorney General Dick Thornburgh and former Associated Press President Louis Boccardi to conduct an independent investigation into the matter and they prepared a 224 page report. White House spokesman Scott McClellan said the administration appreciated CBS' steps to hold people accountable. Conservative pundit Rush Limbaugh insisted the network "had an axe to grind" with President Bush. Washington Post media critic Howard Kurtz said it would take the network a long time to get over "a high-profile blunder."

Al Gore got more votes in the 2000 election but lost to President Bush. This CBS mountain out of a molehill incident and the Swift Boat baloney cost John Kerry the Presidency and handed it to President Bush. The story didn’t even mention that President Bush was a lying warmongering deserting alcoholic. In the good book Jesus Christ says, “You strain at gnats yet you swallow camels whole.”

Presently a bipartisan panel, led by Daddy’s former Secretary of State James Baker III and former Rep. Lee Hamilton, D-Ind. is trying to figure out a new strategy in Iraq. The members, according to CBS News correspondent David Martin have agreed on an all-out diplomatic offensive with Iraq's neighbors — including Iran and Syria — to get help in stabilizing Iraq. However President Bush continued to express his reluctance to talk with two nations he regards as pariah states working to destabilize the Middle East. Who came up with the phrase “People who live in White Houses shouldn’t throw stones”?

Meanwhile David Icke reports that Daddy Bush is in Saudi Arabia at a séance of the Carlysle Group being presided over by its chairman Count Hans Kolvenbach, aka The Black Pope, the Jesuit General, and the ruler of the New World Order announced by President Bush in his State of the Union Address. They are channeling instructions from their masters the space lizard Illuminati on what to do next. Don’t be alarmed. Every Egyptian, Greek and Roman Emperor had their oracles. I guess the American voters do not expect as much from their leaders as the shareholders of the Oracle Corporation. The Roman Emperor had to recall Pontius Pilate to Rome for excess brutality. The Appian Way leading into Rome was lined with crucifixes as a warning to visitors not to mess around. Those were the days when Emperors knew how to conquer the World.

Imagine Alexander the Great with 25,000 100 megaton nuclear bombs and vast storehouses of chemical and biological weapons. It would have taken him maybe 3 hours to conquer the Middle East for America in partnership with Russia. People conduct wars too civilly today. It’s like watching paint dry. Get it over with already so Jesus can come. Maybe that’s why Count Kolvenbach sent Pope Benedict XVI to Turkey, to spark the Apocalypse. These reptiles are vicious bloodthirsty monsters and they have their finger on the button. At least they have good senses of humor. President Bush is going to fly to Iran to beg President Ahmidinejad’s Cleric puppet masters to help him out in Iraq. Superman couldn’t get us out of this pickle. This calls for Spam Man. CBS News President Sean McManus now reports that in an effort to boost troop morale the USO is sending Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Kanye West, Bono, Elton John and Beyonce to the Green Zone to “entertain” the troops and to commemorate the 10th anniversary of the death of Princess Diana. Watch for special guest appearances by British soldiers Prince Harry and Prince William, who are to be introduced by Spam Man.

About the Author: Karen Fish is a writer currently living in Los Angeles California. The Temple of Love

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