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How the Heck do Marriages Ever Work? Maybe a Wedding Memory Book Can Help.
Next time you see an eighth-grade boy doing gross stuff, go easy on him. He is simply trying to cope with the chaotic urges of puberty. God has to be the greatest comedian in the universe. He created men drunken and pulsating with testosterone then commanded us to think only pure and virtuous thoughts. Meanwhile, the throbbing animal instincts are so overpowering that if that poor eighth grader sees a fence post with a slightly sensuous curve, he breaks into a hot sweat. To cope, he immediately has to think about gross stuff like pimples, vomit, and granny panties. It’s not that eighth grade boys are dumb, it’s just that it’s simply impossible for a pulsating, throbbing boy to diagram sentences when the girl in the next row is wearing a white see through sweater that is so tight you could pluck it, and it would produce a beautiful, buxom, titillating D flat. Excuse me for a moment...zits, granny panties, vomit. Zits, granny panties, vomit!
Then there are women and their photographic memories. The other day I was in an argument with my wife and she said, “You’re so rude, just like that time in 1982 when we went to my family reunion and I was wearing that green top with white stripes and those cute green earrings with white sparkles. You were so rude to me that day. You were wearing a blue t-shirt and a white baseball cap and you left me to tend the baby while you ran off and played softball. You’re so rude!” I think I have about six memories of the eighties: we got married, somebody shot J.R., some babies were born, we moved, and one of The Beatles died. It hurts my head to think that far back.
My point is simple: God created man then injected him with about three gallons of testosterone--that benign little hormone that causes bighorn sheep, while standing on the edge of a three-thousand foot precipice, to rear back on their hind legs and charge each other smashing heads at a combined speed of about sixty miles per hour. After they wake up, they shake their heads a few times then do it again! This activity can sometimes last for hours until one ram completely knocks the testosterone out of the other and wins the right to marry the prettiest ewe with a photographic memory and an overpowering urge to remind him how rude he is.
God must be sitting up in heaven laughing his guts out: “Hey, Moses, check this out! What chance do you give this marriage of working?” And yet with all the ironic inertia and imminent impossibilities, marriages work.
Though the world is trying to portray marriage as a an outdated and superfluous institution, there is nothing else on earth that molds, refines, and shapes weak individuals into awesome human beings like marriage does. I went to school with a guy who was your proverbial “all American boy.” He had blond wavy hair and a square jaw--you’ve seen him on the cover of a hundred crappy love novels. He never married; maybe there was just too much beauty to waste on one woman? I’m not Fabio or Brad Pitt so I wouldn’t know how a Greek God thinks, but today, Mr. All America is fat and bald. Yes, this gives my vanity a galactic boost, but my only point is that HE NEVER GREW UP! He is still trying to be the high school golden boy.
On the other hand, I see my old friends who have been married for many years. The change is amazing. The fighting; the apologizing; coping, enduring, and sacrificing creates amazingly changed and improved human beings. Marriage is not easy. In fact, about half of all marriages end in divorce. But couples who create a wedding memory book have a greater chance of making it work. Paul Allen--one of the original founders of MyFamily.com(a)--in talking about the importance of a wedding memory book, said: "These have the potential to lower the divorce rate! During hard times, couples will be able to go back and remember why they love each other."
On November 15, 2006, iMemoryBook.com released their wedding memory book. It doesn't cost a thing to start your book. You collaborate with friends and family to compile photos and memories. Whenever you are ready, you use iMemoryBook's professional press and bindery to create your wedding memory book.
About the Author: www.imemorybook.com/wedding_memory_book
FamilyLearn Inc. helps you strengthen and unify your family by inspiring and enabling you to preserve, search, share, and learn from life’s stories.