The Potter, The Witch and The Druglord
The Potter, The Witch and The Druglord
While the Harry Potter juggernaut bulldozes merrily along, just about everybody has stepped into the cauldron of hot, churning action. And that includes drug dealers no less! Heck, they know a good thing when they see it!
Not to be left out of the Harry Potter phenomenon, New York drug dealers have started peddling ecstasy pills engraved with Harry Potter book and movie images. One can only assume their thinking must be that the success of the Potter behemoth would surely rub off on their products, even if in only some small way; after all, in Harry Potter Universe, small magically translates into a respectable sum in Muggleworld. That said, it is evident that these guys aren't too savvy when it comes to demographics. Even if utilizing super-elastic mind-stretch, it's hard to picture the average Harry Potter fan cavorting and gyrating wildly in some hip nightclub, as the image of their idol slowly fizzles to nothing deep inside of them.
Still, anything is possible, especially when it comes to the Potter phenomenon. Some people feel it is their divine entitlement to have a slice of that not-so-free Potter pie. Take the case of the 20-yr old bodybuilder from the UK. I think that he took the saying "Ask and ye shall be given" a wee bit too literally. In June of 2005 Bodybuilder X somehow helped himself to two copies of The Half-Blood Prince before its official release and tried to sell them to a newspaper reporter from The Sun using a rather persuasive argument--the business end of an imitation gun. As you can probably guess our erstwhile bodybuilder didn't get too far in his marketing and leverage scheme, despite ambitiously expanding the campaign to include threatening and blackmailing Harry Potter UK publisher, Bloomsbury.
At his trial in spite of an impassioned defense argument that included gems such as--"There was a marked change in Bodybuilder X's personality as he pursued his body building interests. He was taking steroids to an almost unsupportable level" -- Bodybuilder X was sentenced to four years as a guest at one of her majesty's less luxurious retreats, where he will have ample time to ponder on future business ventures while furthering the pursuit of bodily perfection, but this time without the unsupportable support of steroids.
So what's the moral of this affair? Your guess is as good as mine. But one thing is certain, it's getting harder and harder to discern what's fiction and what's truth in this magical realm. There're many who claim that this whole Harry Potter saga is a diabolical plot of the devil and an insidious campaign manufactured by those with a leaning towards the darkside.
Nothing new there of course, but it would appear the legions of those who view Potter and his pals as lesser demons is growing. Their movement gained considerable momentum following claims by sources (anonymous of course) who reported seeing scores of bug-eyed, traumatized kids after a screening of The Goblet of Fire (well what do you expect when little 6-yr old Timmy is taken to a dark PG 13 movie).
There're also several unsubstantiated claims of teens converting en masse to Wicca (religion of witchcraft) and generally accepting Harry Potter as the new messiah (or devil).
My particular favorite is the claim that Harry Potter does drugs (Aahh, clarity at last! That whole drug dealer connection makes a lot more sense now. They've really got the pulse of this Potter dude!).
Some of the proponents of Harry Potter as the raving junkie offer the following as evidence to support their claims:
"I don't expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through human veins, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses...I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory...." (This is an excerpt from a speech given by the Potions Master in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.)
Well I retort, it cannot be poor Harry's fault that he got enchanted by the delicate power of liquids creeping through his veins. It's the school's fault of course. What did Hogwarts expect, tempting minors with images of bottled fame and teaching the basics of Meth-lab 101? That's for College. Shame on them!
But seriously! Anybody can read something in nothing if they really want to. If you so wish, fantasy fiction becomes an evil plot to convert unsuspecting innocents by the cauldron-full to the ways of the darkside. Beautifully imaginative prose somehow manifests into a blueprint for witchcraft and drug manufacture...it goes on and on, and there is no limit, but only that of your fevered imagination.
There will always be decriers of anything and everything. It is a well-established and much practiced tradition that gives meaning and purpose to a perhaps less-than-meaningful existence.
I say, it all boils down to common sense and good parental guidance. I remember when I first read Interview With The Vampire (by Anne Rice) as a kid--it just blew me away! It transported me into a mythical, colorful magical world that mesmerized...which alas I can never revisit again because I'm no longer a kid. My mind of today is hardened and little receptive to the invisible, magical world of fantasy that shimmers all around us.
Contrastingly my childhood brain was pliant and supple--disbelieving yet believing--the best state to appreciate fantasy... is it really true or isn't it?
I really liked the vampires (well some of them) and I often had dreams where I'd soar high in the night sky, my pearly white fangs sparkling with leashed menace. But I can honestly claim to have never had the slightest inclination or desire to suck blood, human or otherwise.
So folks, let's allow the kids (and others) to enjoy a good read for what it is, and be done with it!
But that doesn't mean I don't intend to get my grubby fingers on a slice of that potter's pie. All this Potter talk and rhetoric has rooted the germ of an idea...a budding business venture--my new film...
Coming soon to a theatre near you.
The Potter, The Witch and The Druglord!
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About the Author: Ba Kiwanuka is the owner of PotterHub.com